Blurt It Out!!

He’s here :)

Posted on: March 15, 2011

My baby boy is out from the womb. He’s 25 days today. Cute and clever, my Muhammad Danish Rayqal.

I’m not telling my labour story as I’m still trying to forget it. It was really an unforgettable experience. The most painful experience for 17 hours. Enough said, I still cringe when I think about it.

The first 4 days was nice as I’m at the hospital thus the reality has not kick in yet. Got nurse taking care of me and baby. At night, I just tell the nurse to give baby formula after one night trying to get him to breastfeed, he still hungry. My milk supply is very low and he’s really hungry and get angry when he don’t get it.

When I got back with the baby, the reality sank in. My whole body is still in pain that each time I move my limb, it hurt so bad. and we couldn’t find any masseur to massage me either!

I’m also very determined to fully breastfeed my baby. But my milk supply is really low and a baby boy, they really drink a lot. I’m so stressful each time I need to give him formula cos even after 3 hours non stop of breastfeed, he is still hungry and crying. And my nipple bleed too! He only have gum but they are still sharp! And after few nights in a row, I gave up. And I have been crying everyday too. Stress that my body in pain, my milk supply so low, I can’t feed my baby, stress with everything! I don’t even bother to reply any messages or accept any call bcos it’s really depressing.

My in laws start taking him at night so that I can sleep at night. Imagine, he woke up at 12am and until 4am, he still won’t sleep or just short nap. I can’t take it as I myself not strong. But I’m having my confinement at my in laws thus I feel like I have to take care of him myself, I feel quite shy to ask helps from my in laws, feel like a burden. But how can I, with all the pain want to take care of everything? Hubby advised to learn to accept others help, so I did.

I hired a confinement lady to take care of me for a month but upon learning that I delivered through c-sec, she can only start massage and tungku me after 10 days. After her arrival things start to get better. She tungku me twice a day, massage once a day and every few days, scrubbed! She also cooks for me and massage my baby as baby tend to get bloated.

However, baby still sleep with my in laws at night which sometimes made me feel detached from him but again, I just think too much. Huhuhu

Will update more when I’m in the mood, hehe


1 Response to "He’s here :)"

alahai..kesiannya u, tak sangka u were that depressed. hang on ok. first time mommy mmg macam tu, clueless with everything. but trust urself, u r doing great πŸ™‚

yes, u definitely need extra hands. mmg tak boleh jaga baby alone during the confinement. and tido when baby tido ok πŸ˜€

stress is the ultimate enemy to breastmilk! my milk start produce after zahra masuk hospital sebab jaundice, because finally i can get some proper rest and less stress. yeah, taking care a baby mmg taking a toll on u.

anyway all the best! wpun letih, it’s something u’ll treasure πŸ˜€

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