Blurt It Out!!

So many memories happen that I should jot here so it become stories and may one day bring smiles when memories are played.

19/2
Danish turned 2. I never imagine a 2 year old boy to be like him. He only been living for 2 years and seems to achieve so much! Yes, I’m so proud of him. Especially with his vocabs. Amaze me everyday with all the cute phrases he pick up. Now is crucial time to care about what come out of our mouth cos he might remember and repeat what may embarrass us, huhuhu.

So we had a little celebration (dinner n blowing candle), cos now he know what birthday is. He loves birthday song. He loves birthday cake and the idea of blowing candle or hembus api as he would say. The way his face light up n beam when we sang the birthday song. And the thrills he felt when he got to hold a knife and cut a cake! Ahhh, moments like this that u wish u remember forever. Especially when he’s being naughty. 

He is the best gift from Allah to us. Mummy n daddy love u so much Muhammad Danish rayqal.

16/3
Almost a month after his birthday, he had to undergo a minor surgery. We found out he had a branchial fistula, a birth defect which have to be remove immediately before it turn worse. In simple term, he have a small hole at his neck, and there’s extra tube inside which connect the hole with his thyroid. Sometimes, when the tube full, with milk or food etc, we can see some liquid coming out from the hole. So, that extra tube have to be remove as it can lead to cyst and infections. 
It was heart breaking, worrying moment. Though the surgeon is skilled and has experience with this, the negative thought still surround my mind. Especially the thought of losing him. 
Alhamdulillah the surgery went well. The tube has been removed. He got small scar at his neck, which I hope will fade away as he grow up. 

27/3
I was at office, watching the CCTV while doing my work. I heard him telling the maid he got tummy ache. Next moment I saw maid carrying him in her arm, he seems to be like sleeping. I find that odd. Then I heard the maid calling my husband, telling him that Danish just fainted, just so sudden.
I don’t know how to describe my feeling at that time. Seeing your child fainted so sudden, not moving or responds, I was numb. Luckily my office is near to home, I speed and took him to the hospital. 
Apparently his temperature just shot up very high (he didn’t have any fever the night before, even the morning I went to work), he was having fit/seizure and blocked out for few minutes after that. The doc said its common for kids below 5. 
We all cried when it happen. I couldn’t lose him yet. I’m not ready. I love him too much. 
Alhamdulillah the fever subsides and he got discharged the next day. 
Oh, motherhood. I never am ready for all these things.

So that’s my memories on Danish. He still amaze me everyday. 
As for my own life, it’s complicated. There just so many tests that coming that I can only pray to Allah for strength and easiness, to give peace to my heart and mind. 

I am blessed and grateful nonetheless.